Review: MeatLiquor Bristol

MeatLiquor opened the doors to its first bricks-and-mortar premises in London back in 2011- that’s whole world cup ago if you adhere to football time (as I do). 4 years of international footballing pain later, MeatLiquor have decided to join the party here in Brizzle. We went along to try all of the things. All of them. Every single meaty treat. And a boozy concoction called ‘game over’.

First impressions, Meatliquor has a style which is best described as ‘crack-den chic’. Full blown gentrification camouflage if you will. A setting that would undoubtedly make your parents uncomfortable. As The FranBerBad put it:

There’s something peculiarly first-world about Meat Liquor’s carefully curated graffiti plastered aesthetic. And it’s funny that gentrification often comes cloaked in graffiti and ersatz grime. Coming from a country where urban blight is actually real, I’d tell my friends, as they crowd around South Africa’s communal 1998 Hewlett-Packard PC about these funny rich people who pay money to dine in a poverty stricken ambience.

But onto the meat and the liquor. We ordered a few cans of the Moor beer (because it's local,excellent and cans are trendy now) then came the starters (which were actually sides, but we had them first so technically starters. But actually sides #YouGetMeBruv)

Chicken wings and fried pickles. Classic dude food, done very well it has to be said. Very well. If you take nothing else from this review (apart from the fact that The FranBerBad used the word ‘ersatz’) then it’s the fact that MeatLiquor knows their sides. But what’s that on the far side of the tray? It’s macaroni cheese fingers - a highlight. Cheesy fried goodness. Correct me if I’m wrong, but a first for Bristol?

Welcome to the game @meatliquorsin #Burger #meatychristmas #meatlover
A photo posted by Dan Izzard (@simplelampoon) on Dec 8, 2015 at 1:00pm PST

The burgers themselves were solid. Meaty. Well cooked (just a hint of pink in the middle). Solid. Give me the burger a few years ago and I’d have gotten a MeatLiquor tattoo upon my boat-race. But it's 2015 and you as well as I have incredibly high standards. If you were asking; top spots in Bristol go to Chomp and Three brothers, but I am more than willing to broaden my meaty horizons and MeatLiquor definitely has a place up there (especially with a boozy milkshake) I’ll take a brief moment to reflect on ‘fries tax’ though.

Fries tax interlude: When did paying separately for fries become a thing?! I know it’s common now, but that doesn't make it right. Some say; it gives people the choice of whether they want fries or not. Did anyone do a survey to find out whether this was needed? Someone should do a survey (n.b I took a break from this blog to post a survey). I blame London. There I said it. Soz LDN.

What MeatLiquor has over some of the other burger joints is the atmosphere, selection of alcoholic beverages and a playlist with an appropriate level of Beastie Boys (lots). Trays were tidied and the vibe more akin to one of the local bars. Unlike some local bars, they serve a Jagermeister milkshake. So wrong, but so right.

I am sure that MeatLiquor will be a success in it’s location - there may be better burgers around, but there’s still room for MeatLiquor, and even if they are spectacularly late to the party - it's still a party. I’ll let The FranBerBad have the last word:

When I visit places like Meat Liquor I always feel the urge to call my South African friends to tell them stories of the outside world. A magical (United) Kingdom where burgers flow like rivers, and deep fried pickles adorn the route to the alcoholic milkshake waterfall. “But ah, Fran, the burgers, tell us about the burgers,” they’d reply, batting away my philosophising. “It was delicious,” I’d say, picking the meat from my teeth, “a saucy delight.”

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